Things I already knew

This headline, for example. Even if you don't understand German you can probably figure it out. But here's a translation:

No Swiss quality by Swiss sperm.

The sub-headline informs us that in a study of 800 young Swiss men, more than half of them had sperm quality (including total quantity, mobility, and speed) under the international norm. There is at this point no explanation for this, but as for "speed" it's a known fact that Bernese Swiss in particular are slow. What's your excuse, Geneva?

Hat-tip to Husband for SMSing me the headline.